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The Fit and Fluffy Momma

embracing my 'fluff' while finding my 'fit'

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Is Your Comfort Zone really a Fear Trap?

Are you living in your comfort zone?

If you are, let me ask you this… is it really a comfort zone? Or is it a fear trap in disguise?

What I used to consider my “safe place” or my “comfort zone,” I now realize was actually a FEAR trap. My HIDING place. I thought I was comfortable, because I thought I was safe. Hiding. In my insecurities. Behind my walls of fear. And I still do it, although not in all the ways that I used to, and I’m learning to break free from those walls.

Here’s an easier question… do you like selfies? Why or why not? I used to HATE pictures of myself, but I love seeing pictures of friends and family. I still don’t have the desire to look at myself all the time, but I’m ok with my own pictures now. Why? Well, first let me tell you why I used to hate them. I was uncomfortable with myself, and seeing myself made me cringe. I remember watching the movie Princess Diaries as a teen (ever seen it? corny movie, but very sweet) and thinking that I could SO relate to the princess (who didn’t know that she was a princess). She was a quiet, nerdy girl who kept to herself. She actually said that her goal in life was to be invisible, and that she was good at it. That. Was. Me. My goal in life was to be INVISIBLE. I’d come out of my shell now and then, but for the most part I was PAINFULLY shy and would get major anxiety when any sort of attention was focused on me. Just to give you an example, I have always loved to sing and was in chorus all through middle and high school, but anytime I would audition for a solo I would shake and eventually start to cry mid-audition, in front of my teenage peers. CRY. Nobody else did that! Talk about embarrassing… which only added to my desire to be invisible.

When the girl in the movie found out that she was royalty, she wanted nothing to do with it. Being royalty meant having responsibilities that put her in the spotlight, and being invisible didn’t really meet the requirements of being a princess. She was pretty much forced out of hiding, but she still had a choice as to whether she would accept her royal duties or reject them and go back to her quiet life. Her "comfort zone."

I’m no princess, that’s for sure. But I am a child of the greatest King that will ever be. And He created me for a reason. He created you for a reason. And that reason is not to HIDE and pretend we don’t exist. Do you see what I’m getting at here? Insecurities are not comfort zones, they are traps to keep you from letting your light shine in the places that darkness dwells. Who do you look up to? And why? How did you find them? Is there a certain speaker or teacher that you follow? Is there someone you know that has impacted your life simply by sharing their stories and life lessons? If those people had kept to themselves, hidden away in their so-called “comfort zones” and had chosen not to share their lives with you, or the public, or whomever… would you have had the opportunity to be blessed by what you have learned from them?

You have a story, and someone needs to hear it. You might not know who. You might not know when. But if you hide behind your walls of fear and insecurity, you never know who may have needed to hear about your struggles, if just to give them the motivation not to give up on themselves. It doesn’t have to be publicly, it could be someone you meet at the grocery store, the library, your gym, church, or on a park bench. Everyone has struggles, hurts, insecurities. Everyone feels alone sometimes.

Last question - are you someone who makes others feel like they are alone… or are you someone who makes the lonely feel welcome? Be the latter. Embrace the unloveable. If you are living your life in hiding, maybe you are the “unloveable” in your own eyes. If that’s you, I challenge you to embrace the imperfections that you are insecure about. Because there is beauty in your imperfections, and there is healing in love. Love yourself. God made YOU, not just your neighbors. Be humble, but remember to love yourself. And in doing so, you might help others learn to love themselves and discover their own beauty and potential too.

So why am I ok with pictures of myself now? Because I’m ok with myself and my imperfections. I am learning to love myself, flaws and all. And I don’t feel the need to hide anymore. I’m not hiding from myself, or from anyone else. When you learn to believe that you have purpose, and when you begin to truly grasp the fact that you are God’s creation… that is pretty freakin incredible. There is a reason that YOU were made. There is only ONE you. Wonder why... I dare you. But dig deep. Because once you realize the depth of that truth, you will experience more freedom than you can even imagine. Someone else’s opinion of you is only worth the value that YOU place on it. Your TRUE value, your TRUE purpose, is determined by your Creator. Look to Him for approval, not the naysayers around you, and BUST OUT of your FEAR TRAP. Life is much more beautiful on the outside. <3

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